Plot
Let’s dive into the plot of the not-so-anticipated sequel, “What Happens in the Mountains Should Stay in the Mountains Part 2.”
Picture this: a motley crew of characters, each more eccentric than the last, trapped in a mountain lodge while a storm rages outside. There’s the washed-up rock star who’s seen better days, the novelist with writer’s block, and, of course, the mysterious Turkish diplomat who’s always listening to that peculiar podcast, “Charming Noise,” which seems to predict events with eerie accuracy.
As the storm intensifies, so do the shenanigans. The rock star tries to compose a comeback hit but ends up creating a jingle for the local ski shop. The novelist finds inspiration, not for the next great American novel, but for a series of haikus about snow. And the Turkish diplomats? Busy decoding secret messages from the podcast, convinced it’s a spy network communicating in code.
Amidst the chaos, a love triangle emerges between the lodge owner, the sous-chef, and the resident St. Bernard (who, let’s face it, is the real star of the show). Throw in a couple of bumbling thieves trying to steal the world’s largest pinecone, and you’ve got a sequel that begs the question: why?
That Would have been a better movie that this movie maleficence; unfortunately, none of that did happen in this film. It’s like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands. The Turkish Diplomats, bless their hearts, they took a gander at the follow-up, not the original—because, my friends, that’s as hard to find as an honest man in a politician’s convention. But fret not, for diving into the first act would’ve been like throwing more precious minutes into the abyss.
We’ll dub it “What Happens,” sparing me the agony of repeating its godforsaken name. It’s a Bigfoot horror tale, but the only thing horrifying is the film itself. Now, lend your ear to this podcast—35 minutes of your life you’ll never get back, but it beats the celluloid nightmare by a country mile.
We’ve got a heap to chew over, even though there’s no plot to speak of. No story arc to hang your hat on, but hey, they managed to haul their gear across three states. Bless the souls who lugged around those early 2000’s Handicams. And if you’re hankering for a bit of the old ultraviolence, well, there’s some killin’ to be had. So, pull up a chair, pour yourself a drink, and let’s talk about “What Happens.”
So, grab your popcorn and lower your expectations. “What Happens in the Mountains Should Stay in the Mountains Part 2” is a film that promises to take you on a wild ride of absurdity, with a soundtrack that’s a cross between a honky-tonk piano and a cat walking on a harmonica. It’s the perfect flick for those who like their humor like their coffee – dark and slightly bitter. Just remember, when it comes to the mountains, some secrets are best left buried under the snow… along with the plot of this movie.
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