Biohazard (1985): A Cinematic Exploration
Let us delve into the cinematic curiosity that is “Biohazard.” The year is 1985, a time of cinematic experimentation where the boundaries of science fiction and horror are not just pushed, but gleefully obliterated.
The film unfolds in a remote desert research lab, a place as barren and isolated as the hearts of those who dare to tamper with the fabric of reality. Here, scientists, driven by hubris, conduct experiments on transferring matter from other dimensions. It’s a dance with the cosmos, a flirtation with the unknown, and, as with all such reckless waltzes, the music stops abruptly when a container, a Pandora’s box of interdimensional origin, is pried open.
From this container emerges not hope, but a series of monsters, each more grotesque than the last, rampaging, killing, a symphony of chaos unleashed upon an unsuspecting world1. Our protagonist, Mitchell Carter, an army officer with a jaw set against the terrors of the unknown, teams up with Lisa Martyn, a psychic entangled in the web of these experiments, to track down and neutralize the threat.
Angelique Pettyjohn, born Dorothy Lee Perrins, was an American actress and burlesque queen. Known for her role as Shahna in “Star Trek,” she graced various B-movies and TV shows, leaving a lasting mark in cult cinema.
But, oh, the twist! For in this tale of terror, one of the leading characters is revealed to be a monster themselves, a revelation that sends shivers down the spine and calls into question the very nature of humanity1.
Now, imagine this tale recounted with the sardonic wit and eloquence of “The Turkish Diplomats present Charming Noise,” a podcast that revels in the absurdity of B-grade cinema. With each episode, they peel back the layers of films like “Biohazard,” laughing in the face of cinematic folly while sipping on the sweet nectar of satire. It’s a show that Tubi, with its treasure trove of B-movie gems, would find a kindred spirit in, a partnership waiting to happen, a match made in the celluloid heavens.
So, dear listeners, tune in to “The Turkish Diplomats present Charming Noise,” and let the charm of their noise carry you away to a world where the movies are terrible, but the commentary is simply divine.